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Diagnosed with The Big C (Again!)

March 12, 2016

I had a day most cancer survivors dread: a reappearance of the Big C in the sunshine of my day. It casts a dark shadow but I see through its dark heart and know there’s light behind it. Because I never lived in darkness.

I was diagnosed with cancer in my esophagus (sounds like a vegetable I don;t want to eat), Anyway, I know from being a veteran and serving time in the chemo trenches and fighting in chemical warfare that I don;t have the time for self-pity, derpression, fear, or anger. There is nothing I can do if I submit to those emotions. If I indulge in them, then cancer gets an edge on me, I’m playing ITS game, and conceding it has more strength than me.

All I can do is steel myself for battle, stray strong, then get stronger, All I can do is cling to my life like a preservor and get tossed in the current and refuse to let go when the rogue wave hits me and pummels me down to a dark silent space, and hold my breath, and swim with all my might and rage to the sruface. I convert my anger, fear, depression, self-pityt into a roar and a vicious barrage of punches.

Cancer, you really started something, and I’m going to finish it.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. March 14, 2016 6:20 am

    Yes ,well and then there’s the other % with no brain who will vote for Hillary.

    • March 14, 2016 3:55 pm

      Not a fan of Hillary either. The one thing I noticed about Trump is his lack of humor about himself, he’s very quick to laugh at others, and belittle them. He talks like a boss not a leader. His campaign is too George Wallace. And I have a hard time listening to a guy talk tough who went to military school, exscelled in leading military parade drills, then avoids Vietnam with a medical deferment on a foot–and he doesn;t remember which foot.
      But I’m a Bernie guy.

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