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Brooksie didn’t come home

July 24, 2015

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He had a way of looking at you…

Brooksie, 16-years old. Left to go outside. Never came back. Either he left or a coyote got him. We keep the other cats inside because they’re not bait. But Brooks was accustomed to going out, so we accepted that. It was something we thought might happen one day, but what can you do? He started out as an outside cat and finished out as one. We couldn’t change him. We hoped he was coming back, but he didn’t. When we adopted him, we always get the animals fixed. But this guy! Before we did it, he had a perpetual erection. He seethed with hatred at our dog Sevi–especially if I petted the dog.

When I would come home Brooks would greet me halfway up the steps and a neighbor said, “That cat loves you.”
And at night Brooks laid beside me, and would wake up up by licking me. When I petted him, he always looked so deeply into my eyes as I said, Brooks buddy. I know you’re my Brooksie buddy.”

When I got out of the shower, Brooks always came in and licked the water off my feet and I would say, “I know you love me Brooksie buddy.”

He liked me to stick my finger inside his open jaws and run my fingers along with upper roof of his mouth.

When I was reading, he would always come over and lay on the book, and I’d have to give him mega pets before I could get back to the book.

He loved getting his picture taken. If there was a female porno book, he could have been a centerfold–he’d stretch out in a provocative pose! (For the record, we had a Platonic relationship.)

At least all he knew was kindness, which is more than you could say for most people. They remind us we all have expiration dates. Some people spoil before those dates arrive. That’s the battle: avoiding the sense of loss around us.

I wish I could have someone protected him. Or anyone, really.When I had cancer and was shivering under a mound of blankets with Chemo, he snuggled against me, and I petted him to send a message to cancer that I had kindness and I had soul and each pet of affrctyion meant my heart was too strong for cancer to take because I had love and was given love, and no one loved cancer.My heart pets your spirit Brooskie, buddy.

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