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Bitten by the Cancer Creature

May 29, 2012

Recovering from surgery. Sometimes I look back at the gauntlet of medical care I’ve experienced the last six months and feel I’ve been stripped. How many hits can a person take? The surgical gash sometimes resembles a  bite from a Cancer Creature that wanted to eat me. There’s more pinching soreness in the area today. And my legs feel heavier and my feet still feel tingly and half asleep, a result of chemo. I also think it hurt my hearing, and I’m hoping it gets better. And with my last testicle gone, it feels like I have an empty paper bag between my legs.

I don’t see myself as a victim but as a survivoir. But a survivor who is clinging to a inflatable raft of hope in a dark sea as cancer in the form of sharks circle around and sometimes rub their backs along the bottom of the raft. I remain still and reflective, hoping the tumor inside me is just a burnt-out cinder of scar tissue, not a growing sequel. And if it is growing back? What damage will it do to my body? Back in the day, they put leeches on people to bleed them to a cure, and I wonder if my treatment years from now will look like that. Of course now the medical profession still uses leeches, but only to make people pay their medical bills.

People forget. Most survivors to truly live have to be rescued.

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One Comment leave one →
  1. Laureen permalink
    May 29, 2012 8:11 pm

    Hey Fred….I think the sharks are circling my raft today too…..After a great day at the beach yesterday, back to scans,poking , prodding as I start daily radiation for 2 1/2 months feeling like a lab rat again……Yeesh! Ken was asking about you and I filled him in, he was so happy to hear that your surgery went well ,as am I :)…I told him about your eggplant comparison, and that got a groan, then a huge laugh! We are both thinking of you..and hope you are feeling better very soon!

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