Excerpt from Today Cancer, Tomorrow The World – an upcoming book about my battle with The Big C
More of an upbeat excerpt when I sensed by body was making a turn….
This morning for the first time I felt that spark within my body, a rising call that brought these images to me. Healthy signs. Signals that I was getting stronger. Words like Complete Blood Counts, Lactic Acid Dehydrogenese, and Comprehensive Metabolic Panel meant nothing in this world. Their meanings could no longer hold me. I was released I rose with a spark. No longer reduced by multiplying cells. My soul wasn’t retreating from my body. I was returning to a world of a health opening up its game board for me to take out my pieces and dice and play. This was a force I’ve been drilling for, the slight drip of a gusher. And I lay upon its steady pulse and my chest lifts up and I breath deep. I will return to the beach and take in the day. I still have some rough hours ahead, but that first beat of health is powering me, and it’s broiling, knotting, and rising and cresting a building force in me that it only going to get me stronger. I have that first day of summer inside me and there’s no turning away from that dawn. I’m will return to the pull of the summer breeze on my first day out of chemo. And I will know everyone in the world. But after emerging through this curing world of pain no one is a stranger to me anymore.
I see you.